Let's Get Some Things Straight

After numerous facebook posts I think its about time for me to say something.

I understand that people want to be able to say, "I have the worse the job", "I have the most dangerous job" and I understand spouses would like to say the same thing about their husbands job. Well, I am one of those people that realize EVERY job has to be hard and EVERY job has difficult situations. I would NEVER try and understand what someone else is feeling while their husband is away at work. And I hope people realize that for me, you will NEVER understand what I am going through unless you are a military spouse. And until you become one, don't ever tell me how I should feel. (And being a kid in the military is hard, yes, but you NEVER understand what your mother goes through until you are a mom with kids and your husband is in the military). 

When your husband is gone for 2 months on a sub, and you don't hear from him for 2 months, don't tell me how I should feel.

When your husband is deployed and you have no idea when he is coming back or even where he is, don't tell me how I should feel.

When you are home for months on end raising your kids and being both parents for more then two weeks, don't tell me how I should feel.

When you have to learn to do everything around the house down to fixing drains, unclogging toilets, doing all the man work, don't tell me how I should feel.

When every single responsibility is on YOU to keep the house running, kids fed, dressed etc for more then 2 weeks, don't tell me how I should feel.

When you have your first baby and your husband leaves the day your baby turns one month old and is only home 3 months out of that first year, don't tell me how I should feel.

When you have your second baby and its the same thing, but now you have two kids, don't tell me how I should feel.

Until you have flown on an airplane with 2 kids under the age of two for a funeral by yourself while being sick, and your husband can't come because the sub doesn't think its important enough, don't tell me how I should feel.

When you have to drop your husband off at the airport for a deployment and you have no idea where he is going, when he is coming back, or even IF he is coming back, don't tell me how I should feel.

When you hear something that has happened to a sub and you don't know if your husband was on that sub or a different one because he can't tell you, and every phone call could be the end of your world, don't tell me how I should feel.

When you have to move houses because you are expecting and your husband is deployed, the military won't move you because they have already moved you once, and all you have to help you is your mom, sister and your sister's friend, while you are 5 months pregnant, don't tell me how I should feel.

When you know that your husband had to go through a school on how to TEACH him how to be if he is ever a POW (Prisoner of War) and every time he goes on deployment you keep thinking that that is a possibility, don't tell me how I should feel.

There are plenty more but you get the idea. And for those that don't know, because of Jarred's job, he CAN NOT tell me what he does, where he goes when he goes on deployments, or when he is coming back. So when he leaves, he pretty much falls of the face of the earth for at least 2 months. I have heard of women having web cams on in the delivery rooms so there husbands who are deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan can watch the birth of their baby. I honestly don't care if you think you/your husband has the worse job. And you know, you may be right. But at least have enough RESPECT for the men and women and their families who go through this on a DAILY BASIS and who move every 3 years. Who leave the friends they made to somewhere else to protect YOUR freedom, at least RESPECT THAT. 

Let's play myth busters. 

Military DOES NOT get FREE HOUSING. We get a housing allowance (yes that is a BENEFIT) and we have to pay rent, we pay utilities. The worse part is, if you have ever lived in military housing for the most part its a joke. Do you know how many people on Buckley don't live there? And why? Because the houses are built so crappy electric bills during the winter are AT LEAST $300. 

Military DOES NOT get FREE MEDICAL. We pay for it. Maybe not as much as a civilian but we do pay for it. And if you have EVER been to a military medical facility you will know most military would rather go to a civilian medical facility. For the most part its such crappy care.

Military men and women DO NOT GET PAID A LOT. Everyone, well, some people know, that if you want money DO NOT join the military. =) I think just from that, you can see that most people in the military do not care about money, they do it to keep their family and friends safe. To keep the USA free. 

I am probably going to get a lot of people mad for writing this blog. But this was not singled out to any particular person. This is for everyone who reads my blog. I think sometimes people need reminders what exactly the military men and women and their families have to go through in order to keep this the Land of the Free. 

Like I said earlier, I do not, for one minute think that military is one of the most dangerous jobs. I think thats all in the eyes of the beholder. But don't for one minute think, or try and justify that they aren't important. EVERY job (that goes from the garbage man to people on wall street etc) in society plays a roll in how the wheels of America roll, but until you are in that persons shoes, don't try and tell them how to feel.